Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Randomize
