you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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