It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize