Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
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She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
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HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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