The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
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