I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
