jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
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