Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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