The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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