She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
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She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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