I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize