Why are handjobs necessary in class?
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
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