hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Randomize
