I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
