dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
