your room smells of hookers.
And success
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
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