why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
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