She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Houston, we have a blender
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"