Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
How does one acquire holy water?
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
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