So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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