During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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