uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
