Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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