nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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