I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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