party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
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Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
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He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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