Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
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