Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
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