Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
my sisters under your porch take her home
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Randomize
