I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
