people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Randomize
