Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.