addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Randomize
