Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Randomize
