I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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