There was a lot of him and a little penis
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
