The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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