haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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