why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
