Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!