Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
only if we run a train.
done.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
