i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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