If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
