It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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