my vag is so smooth its legendary
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
