turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
