omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
