You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
