Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
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