Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
